How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Every concussion has its silver lining
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
