To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
