Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize