She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
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