all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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