if i can run in heels then i can drive
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
