my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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