No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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