He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
