So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize