can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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