I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
