Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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