I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
