with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
