Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
