Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
