I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
