It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
