do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
