So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
