Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
