You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
