This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
