His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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