Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
