my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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