people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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