when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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