we have officially lost it.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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