Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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