I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Dignity is for republicans.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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