I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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