the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
