Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Randomize
