i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize
