i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i just google imaged poop.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
