Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
