You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
