how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
