seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
