i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
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