I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
