I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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