I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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