i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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