i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Holy sore nipples Batman
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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