But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I can't trust your balls anymore.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
