One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
