When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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