Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I will die if light touches me.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
why does every cop we meet know your name?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
